What are your Re-solutions for 2010?

As another year draws to a close you may find yourself spending time reflecting on the past twelve months or indeed the past decade as the noughties passes us by. Take stock of your successes as well as your failures. It is important to honour your accomplishments in the past year and congratulate yourself on how well you have done.

As you turn your attention to what the coming year may hold, think about what changes you may want to make. Do you want a better car, new home, to lose some weight, change jobs? Whatever it is, it is possible to achieve these things, but it is down to you. I heard a quote recently which makes alot of sense: "Nobody can push you into the success you deserve." If you are not really happy with your life and how the last twelve months have been, then now is a great time to think about what is not working and how you could make changes to get more of what you do want. Did you make re-solutions last year? If so, did you keep them? If not, explore why. Were your resolutions accompanied by a plan to help you succeed or were they just a sweeping statements which you make every year?

In order for your life to really change and to not be in the same situation next year you need to take action towards achieving and keeping your resolutions. Your resolutions needs to have a practical solution and get you excited when you think about them. It was reported recently that 90% of people that make new years resolutions break them within the first month. Don't be another statistic next year. Decide on what you want and then set about achieving it.

Wishing you a fabulous and successful 2010.

What is the best version of yourself?

When you are being the best version of yourself, what does your life look like?

When you are being the least liked version of yourself, what does your life look like?

What springs to mind? Write it down quickly without thinking to much about it. You may be surprised by your answers. Interestingly, when we are being the best version of ourselves other parts of our lives seem to follow suit. For example, managing household chores, our wellbeing, our work all seem to have a certain ease and grace which enables us to complete tasks effortlessly.

Thinking about the worst version of yourself helps you get perspective about areas of your life that are not working. This version of yourself no doubt limits you in so many ways and makes you unhappy and unmotivated. Therefore, if you know how good being the best version of yourself feels, why would you want to live your life any other way? The benefits of being the best version of yourself are endless and you deserve those benefits. You are worthy of great things.

If completing this little exercise has made you aware that you are not being the best version of yourself, then don't despair just start to make incremental changes towards your best self. Believe me if will eagerly repay you and help you along the way. Start by doing something small today towards regaining the best version of yourself. The key to regaining your best self is not to get overwhelmed, just take it slow and make tiny little changes daily. The changes that are required are different for everyone and you have an inner knowing as to what those changes should be.

Here's to the best version of you!

The Reality of Reality TV

I was prompted to write this after being awoken having dreamt of a guy having pec implants! I traced the origins of this back to a programme that I had been mindlessly watching the day before. It was a reality show where a bride and groom agree to have cosmetic surgery and not see each other for the month prior to their big day. Now call me old fashioned, but I find this pretty extreme and somehow sad that these people are willing to put themselves under the knife all for vanity. However I did give it an hour of my time in order to see the end result!

This got me thinking about how I use tv and how the flurry of reality tv programmes enables us to focus on the flaw's of others, rather than think about our own. We happily judge and idly gossip about another's behaviour without having to dwell on ours. Funny that many people say that they do not have time to focus on the things that are important to them, but yet they find the time to focus on things that will be meaningless in a few short days or months. We are often quick to judge the lives of others we see on tv, but are unwilling to clean up our own.

Through reality tv we get caught up in the lives of others and in turn we allow others to determine what we focus on. Have you ever found yourself watching tv when you know you should be doing something important like attending to your family? Or looking at people on tv enviably because they are doing what you long to do? Yet you prefer to attend to the remote control.

If so, then it is not to late to reclaim those lost hours. I am not saying that you have to stop watching tv completely, just choose more carefully what you watch and when. Decide how much and when you want to use your tv, rather than just having it on for the sake of it. Watch what you really enjoy and gain value from and ditch the rest. Remember the people on the screen are strangers and forever will be. Don't let your own greatness pass you by whilst lounging on the sofa watching life, but not living life.

Unleash The Mighty Toddler Within

We are born with an ability to get all of our needs met, be it a clean nappy, milk, cuddles, comfort, attention etc. As newborns when we became aware of our empty tummy we would wail excessively, prompting our caregiver into action. This is because our survival depended on it. Then as we become toddlers we have a supreme sense of self worth which allows us to engage with the world expecting to get our needs fulfilled. At this age we more often than not get exactly what we desire. To see this in action, watch a toddler decide that they want a certain toy. Very little will prevent them from getting it!

We can learn a lot from the behaviour of children and how we can incorporate some of their determination and focus into our own lives.

You know the drill, you decide that you are sick and tired of the way things have been and make a pact with yourself to make some changes. You may even write your goals down and have great intentions of achieving them. You can feel that you are on the brink of living a truly awesome life and can taste the sweet smell of success and then what happens? You hit a roadblock and instead of seeing this for what it is, a minor setback which needs a solution, it stops you in your tracks and you retreat into the comfort and often boredom of your everyday life, less determined to step outside of your comfort zone again!

Life was not intended to be lived this way. People who lead amazing lives take risks and are willing to stretch themselves regularly in many aspects of their lives. They are also less likely to be swayed by other people’s opinions, much like the mighty toddler. Many of us feel inspired to live our lives in a certain one or do something which we really enjoy, but stop short of actually doing it for fear of rejection or what others may think or say about us. As the adage goes ‘most people are too busy thinking about themselves to worry about what you’re thinking’. So if you know you are guilty of this, remember it is never too late to become who you might have been.

Unleash the mighty toddler within you and get what you want.

Stop trying to change your past..

Sounds strange, but many of us try and do this again and again. We endlessly obsess, re-live, revisit or replay scenes from our past in the hope we will gain a better understanding or clarity about our present lives. Some things are best forgotten and to waste more of your valuable energy revisiting them makes no sense.

For instance someone may have upset you that you do not particularly care for, so why then do you give away more of your valuable energy discussing it with anyone within earshot? We all fall into this trap sometimes, but the key is to become more aware of when you are doing this and stop yourself. Change the topic, no matter how difficult it is. This may seem hard to do in the beginning, particularly if you are having a juicy venting session with a friend, but think about it, does the person you are discussing deserve more of your precious time? Move on and let it go.

We also fall prey to trying to change our past. For instance you may feel that your parents did not do their best for you whilst you were growing up. Acknowledging and exploring this may be important, but be wary of letting it dominant your present life. As Dr Robert Holden puts it

"To be really happy, you have to give up all hopes of having a perfect past."

What a powerful quote, none of us have had a perfect past, but that does not have to dictate our present or future life.

Focus on all the things that are great in your present life and whilst you're at it show yourself some serious care and acknowledge how well you have coped with things in your past that were difficult.

Focus on what you want.. how hard can it be..?

Focus on what you want.. how hard can it be?

We often hear how we need to focus on what we want and not what we don't want. The films the Secret, Heal Your Life, What the Bleep Do We Know and The Shift discuss this which is also commonly known as the law of attraction or manifesting. There is also a myriad of books now available on this subject. The basic idea is that you attract the things you desire into your life by focusing on them. Easier said than done I hear you say..

Well here are 5 strategies which will help you get focused and start attracting what you do want:

1. Get clear about what you honestly want in your life - the more precise you can be about what tou desire, the more opportunity it has of showing up.
2. Speak it into existence - Start to talk about your dreams and hopes confidently and know that they will come true.
3. Surround yourself with like minded people - Avoid energy zappers and only share your vision with those who are excited about what you want to achieve.
4. Be open to new experiences and take risks - Just focusing on what you want and talking about it unfortunately is not not enough, start to take steps in achieving your goals. Join a networking group, learn a new skill, get a mentor or coach. Whatever it is take action to move you in the direction you want.
5. Know that you truly deserve what you desire - This is often hard for us to do as we may feel that others deserve their success, but somehow we are not worthy. Try to limit this type of thinking and know that there is more than enough for everyone and you deserve to be prosperous and fulfilled.

Happy manifesting!

Is what you believe, true?

The title of this blog is to probe you to ponder about what you actually believe!

We often go through life not really questioning what we have become to believe is true. Or why we do things that do not make us happy or repeat experiences that we know have negative outcomes. Sound familiar? We all do this to a greater or lesser extent and the reasons for this can include, self sabotage, self doubt, fear of success or failure and concern of what others will think.

It can also be due to messages we received from parents and people around us when we were growing up. These messages however subtle can influence us greatly in later life. We have formed a set of beliefs which we defend and justify furiously if needed. However, on closer inspection it is interesting to see where these beliefs originate and if indeed they are true or helpful to us. They may have served a purpose in our early years, but need to be replaced now.

An example of a belief that is not helpful could be that you believe that people don't want you to be successful. On closer inspection you may be able to pinpoint when you first adopted this belief and then look at how this belief may have negatively impacted on you in different areas of your life. We often realise that these beliefs have no substance to them and are a faulty belief that we have often picked up from someone else.

Now the good news is that these beliefs can be replaced and in a relatively short period of time. In the same way that you can decide to have champagne and strawberries for morning tea, instead of your usual latte and muffin, replacing beliefs works in the same way. Make a conscious decision to replace a negative belief. In the example we have used, you could replace the belief that people don't want you to be successful with 'everyone I come in to contact with is helping me to succeed in all I do'.

This may feel a little awkward initially, but with a bit of practice it will become natural. It will also make a big difference to what you achieve from now on. Give it a go and see what happens.